How is psychological attachment formed? Energy bindings between a man and a woman That his beginning is tied to

There are a lot of incomprehensible things in the relationship between a man and a woman. Each of us wants to be loved. But how not to become strongly attached to a man? It can sometimes be hard to tell where the line between healthy and already painful attachment ends. Where is love, and where is dependence? And in general, in a relationship, you need to become attached to a man quickly or better, keep your distance as long as possible?

How not to get too attached?

Attachment trap

Where love is kindled, there always appear its fellow travelers - dependence and affection. After all, a child is born absolutely dependent on other people, and it is on this soil that his love and affection then develop. As strange as it may seem, love, even in relationships with parents, does not always arise immediately.

Love is the acceptance of another with all its advantages and disadvantages. This is the ability to perceive a person as a whole. The child in the first years of his life sees his mother only in the best light. She is the best for him, the smartest, the most beautiful, well, in general, the very best. He certainly idealizes the parent figure. And only in adolescence begins the process when idealization leaves and comes in its place. deidealization. During this period, a teenager sees only one shortcomings and weaknesses of his parents.

And only after passing through this stage does it become possible to accept parents as they are, and it is this acceptance that opens up the ability for mature love in a person.

In a couple, in the same way, a man and a woman will have to come to true love, having gone through dependence and affection. At the same time, someone successfully solves the tasks set before the soul, while someone gets stuck in the negative.

If a child's need for love has never been satisfied, then in the future, an adult will seek to fill the gap in the relationship. In pursuit of love, a woman does not notice how she falls into her own trap. Being in a long and close relationship with a man, she does not see how, becoming attached to him, she begins to lose herself. She seems to dissolve. Her desires and interests disappear. She submits herself and her life to HIM. And not because she loves her very much, but because SHE NEEDS HE to love her. She needs to wrap the man in the web of her love so that he cannot escape. She wants to spin an invisible cocoon in which there is only HE and SHE.

It often happens that having lived with a man for many years, a woman suddenly experiences great disappointment. Looking back, she realizes that she gave her best years to her family and husband, but what is the result? He found a young and beautiful one. The children flew out of the nest. And here a woman faces a difficult task - to find a new meaning in life. How to find something for which you want to live? How to find joy and learn to appreciate every moment of life?

You need to understand that you never need to do something only for the sake of another person. Always ask yourself: “Do I want this?” Sometimes a woman clearly feels and realizes that she does not want something, but there is a word “must” ...

Often you are absolutely sure that you know what you want to do, but only then, for some reason, disappointment and pain appear.

It is in the nature of a woman to give more than to receive. Therefore, it binds faster and stronger. In a relationship, the one who gives more is attached more strongly.

The power of affection

Why is this happening? Why do you think a person begins to feel love for flowers, trees, which he takes care of? Why are some of us more attached to animals than to people? How does attachment arise?

Attachment is born when you make a long and constant effort, taking care of someone or something, in a word, you invest your energy, time and effort. As soon as you begin to give your energy, you become attached to the object to which you give a part of yourself.

We love people not for the good they do to us, but for the good we do for them. The more we invest in relationships, the faster and stronger we become attached.

We become attached even when we think a lot about a man. We scroll through the conversations in our heads, his monologues. We think about the causes of quarrels and his problems.

Attachments appear when we emotionally react to anything. After all, it is not in vain that they say that if you want to be remembered, hurt the feelings of the interlocutor. And it doesn't really matter which ones. Even anger. The person we pissed off a lot will remember us for a long time.

We become attached even when we care about someone. Cooking, cleaning, washing… “Have you taken your medicine? Have you made an appointment with a doctor?" If you have met a man recently, do not start taking care of him until you are sure that he is really the one you need. Don't get attached too quickly yourself, and don't get attached to someone who might not be your man at all.

We also become attached when we have sex. All women's excuses that they need sex only for health are self-deception. Once for health, two ... and then you want for the soul.

Don't lose yourself in affection

If you think that your to a man prevents you from living, then start giving less of your energy to him and relationships in general. Don't fill up all the space. Do not deprive a man of the opportunity to do anything for you. Thus, you will stimulate the emergence of his feelings for you. Although women, striving for love with all their might, act the other way around - they try to do more for a man and demand less from him. They create simply chic conditions for him next to him. And then they complain about how comfortable he is with her and how well he settled down. And feel used and miserable.

Whether you like it or not, any of us will be offended if there is no reciprocity. Especially if only we, unilaterally, make efforts. Doing something for someone, we, without realizing it, expect gratitude and, not receiving, we are offended. And resentment, like rust, corrodes relationships. Being offended, we emotionally distance ourselves from a person, and at the same time, he may feel abandoned and unnecessary, lonely.

Women's resentment, discontent and anger at a man lead to the fact that his affairs begin to get upset, all sorts of troubles begin to happen to him. Of course, a woman is not a monster that sends black forces to a partner, but she is able to influence joint space. Being next to an offended, dissatisfied partner, a man cannot be prosperous and successful. But do not rush to take responsibility for everything that happens. These processes are mutual. A man also contributes to the formation of female discontent.

What conclusion can be drawn from the above? Learn to hear and listen to YOURSELF. Become independent of male love and attention. Do not make the only goal of your life the desire to get love, to be loved. Then you can be more free in the relationship. You will not be afraid of loneliness.

To be happy with a man, you need to learn how to be happy without him, learn to live without him. Fill your life, but leave a place meant for HIM, just in case. Suddenly, your long-awaited one will come into the light, but do not wait for him, sitting by the window ...

Feminine and masculine energies in relationships

Often a woman, building a relationship with a man, cannot force herself to do her usual things. Her life before and after marriage is very different. Before marriage, there were girlfriends, joint female gatherings, trips, sports, a bath, cosmetic procedures. It wasn't hard to keep fit.

And after 2-3 years of living together with a man, all this gradually fades away. It is becoming more and more difficult for a woman to force herself to do physical education, to take care of herself. And the man, on the contrary, begins to miss the past. And it turns out that she becomes attached, becomes dependent to some extent, and the man, on the contrary, is burdened by too sticky relationships. This is how feminine and masculine energies behave. It happens otherwise. The man becomes more infantile, and the woman more active. This means that the ratio of female and male energies is violated in the union, in the usual sense. More feminine energy accumulates in a man and more he is attached. And a woman who has more male energy gets tired of being with a man.

Another reason for the neglect of women may also lie in the fact that without a man you NEED to look good for HIM. And when you find a partner, you relax. But it turns out that you did everything not for myself.

If you have order and prepared delicious food, when a man is in the house, and without him, mountains of dishes can “decorate” your kitchen for days, then how do you feel about yourself? It turns out that the desire to receive the love of a man pushes you to exploits, but you are not capable of the same efforts out of love for yourself.

Strong attachment leads to the fact that a woman loses herself ... But this is a delusion. She does not lose herself, but on the contrary, she discovers the real HERSELF. And everything that was before that was just a mask, carefully hiding her childish dependent part.

The described process is inevitable in a long and serious relationship. However, you need to be aware of what kind of man is next to you. Is it worth getting attached to someone who does not have good human qualities? To someone who after some time will lose interest in you and, most importantly, respect?

It's not easy not to lose yourself in a relationship. And this is an inevitable process. On my programs, I teach not to be afraid to dissolve in relationships and find the real you again.

But in order not to lose yourself, you need to feel your inner core, your "I". Moreover, there may be a rod, but only it is rigid, “metal”. And when it breaks, you lose yourself. In this case, you have to form a new rod - strong, but flexible, soft, unbreakable.

Many women have told me how, after breaking up, they began to actively move up the career ladder. They became prosperous.

And what prevented them from doing this, being next to a man - to be successful and realized? Why does marriage become a stop in their own development for many? Why does a wonderful feeling of love turn into a cage for the female soul?

We come to Earth in order to hone two of our abilities:

Learn to love and be realized in the business for which we were given our abilities; as well as losing and re-finding yourself in a relationship.

But remember, before you lose yourself, make sure that there is a real, your, man next to you. you will know what your man is.

How not to lose yourself too quickly and not get attached too much ?

1. Know yourself.
Become aware of your desires and goals in life. What else do you want but to be with a man? If you have forgotten, then it's time to remember. If you don't know, it's time to find out. You must see your way of life and feel yourself.

It often happens that a man, realizing or not, takes a woman away from herself and her desires just because her needs do not fit into his picture of life. For example, the husband does not want the woman to work. And when she tells him that she would be interested in working, he begins to argue why it is not necessary to do this: “Unprofitable”, “You will be more useful at home”, “We don’t need money”, “You don’t have enough how much do I give? I’ll give you even more money”, “Come on, we’ll go somewhere to relax, apparently you’re tired of being at home, you need to change the situation…”. And the woman for a while forgets about her desire. This happens several times, and now she completely abandons her aspirations. Travel quickly switches her thoughts - if the child insists on his desire, then he does not need to be denied in a sharp, categorical form, it is enough just to shift his attention to something else.

An adult, unlike a child, constantly keeps his desires and goals in sight.

2. Don't switch quickly to another topic of conversation.
If you have a specific question for a man, and he avoids answering in every possible way, do not lose the thread and purpose of the conversation. Persistently but gently bring him back to the problem that interests you.

3. Don't make hasty decisions.
Women's emotionality often pushes you to hasty promises. And your natural decency will not allow you to then refuse what you have already promised.

4. The most vulnerable female feeling is pity.
A woman can do a lot for a man, not so much out of love, but out of pity. And many years so live with husbands. “But how? "He'll be lost without me."

And how many women out of pity forgive men rough treatment with myself. Remember, pity arises only because there is a child hidden deep inside you that needs your sympathy. Not finding and not feeling it, you become extremely susceptible to the suffering of a man.

5. Learn to accept attention, gifts, care from a man.
Include it in the process of spending - emotions, money, time, care, tenderness ... Do not rush to fill the whole space with yourself. Do not invest in a relationship at first, but rather watch a man. Do not feel obligated to sleep with a gentleman if he paid for you at a restaurant. And don't try to pay for yourself. Let a man take care of you.

Having accepted something from a man, do not feel like you should, do not jump for joy when you receive a single rose as a gift. At the beginning of dating, do not fill the man with your emotions. Do not bring down on him a flurry of your love and unspent tenderness. Don't waste money.

6. Don't buy into beautiful words.
Watch the man's actions. Do not fall for all this talk: “I dreamed about you. God sent you to me. I don’t know why I deserve such a gift.” Be careful. Do not fall into the carefully woven webs of Casanova, who needs you as another trophy. By the way, if you meet Don Juan on your way, then this is probably better. Don Juan is at least sincerely interested in a woman. True, he had and will have such hobbies ... in general, you are not the final station on his journey.

Let go of your strong desire to be loved! Don't limit yourself to just being in a relationship with a man. Life is diverse, and you came to Earth to learn to love yourself first, and only then your loved ones.

Find your purpose in life. Find meaning in many things, as well as its absence.

Do you want to find yourself and get rid of your addiction and attachment to a man?Come to me for

With love,

Irina Gavrilova Dempsey

Due to some differences in thinking, sometimes it is difficult for a woman to understand what she wants from her. the male. So what men expect from a woman depends on their character, mood, sexual and social needs.

Despite their physical superiority, men are often more vulnerable and less self-confident than women. They constantly need persuasion, praise, support and comfort. Yes, there are men who are completely independent and can live their whole lives with one woman, as well as without a woman at all, but such men come across extremely rarely. Most men need the support and love of a woman. It is quite obvious that man becomes attached to you because you call in him sexual desire.

What do you like men in women?

First of all, they look at the face. Almost every the male creates in his imagination a certain type, from which he then repels.

As for the figure: there are few men who pay attention to overweight women and do not like or, conversely, prefer curvy ones. American psychologists have found that most often men react to the proportions of the figure. At the same time, for 50 percent of men, the weight of a woman does not matter at all.

Men also receive sexual impression of you from your hair, skin, chest or walk. It makes sense to try to find out if there is something in your appearance that your partner does not like. Because sex appeal is made up of little things and accidents. For example, they hate long nails painted with bright varnish. A trifle, but it can ruin everything.

How openly can you show your sexual behavior? This largely depends on the age and personality of your lover. Many men are very embarrassed when they are kissed and caressed in public, while others are delighted with it. In general, be careful. The main thing with all appearances, let's understand that you like it.

How sexy does he think you should dress? This also largely depends on his age and character. There was an opinion that the less clothes a woman wears, the sexier she looks. And here is the lie. Studies have shown that men consider the usual tight-fitting blouse, a long skirt with a slit and high heels to be the sexiest women's outfit.

Your lover wants you to be good in bed and able to return his love, and will always appreciate your attempt to bring more fantasy and creativity into your intimate life.

You need to distinguish when the male wants you, and when he wants to express negative emotions through sex. With women it's just the opposite. if they are suppressed by something - it is difficult for them to tune in to a sexual mood. Create an atmosphere in the conversation so that he can relieve emotional stress.

Never completely reject sexual your partner's offer. Men are very vulnerable in this matter. If the answer is no, let him know that he means a lot to you and that you love him very much.

Sometimes a man just needs sex, not love. You can even say this: men prefer sex more, and women prefer love.

Most women like it when a partner whispers something pleasant in her ear. But men rarely do this. Not because they don’t want to, it’s just that it’s difficult for them to say and do something at the same time. Sometimes we women feel like the male looks withdrawn and aloof after sex. Therefore, we must know that a sense of self-control is important for men. And after making love, they just need time to pull themselves together, cool emotions after an orgasm.

Besides sex, what else does he expect from you? Listen carefully when he talks about his official business, for this is his everyday life, about which he may have no one else to tell except you. Warning - love a man the way he is now, otherwise you will be disappointed.

In some cases, your lover may want to see you as a mother. There are moments in life when even the strongest and most powerful men feel helpless and seek help, comfort and advice from a woman.

You yourself must decide how far your maternal feelings can extend to him. But beware of a man who constantly needs their manifestation. His love is immature, and when the moment comes to lean on him, you
may be disappointed. Besides, if you treat a man like a little boy, he will behave accordingly. Treating the man you love like a mother means killing the passion in your relationship.

Few men are so independent that they can work and fight for themselves all their lives. You can help him enjoy the fruits of his labors by showing him your respect and celebrating his accomplishments with him. What's the point in doing some huge commercial project or writing a bestseller if there is no woman around who could appreciate it. Praise your man (interspersed with constructive criticism). It is impossible to overestimate the importance for men of praise and recognition. They need it more than you can imagine.

What can you expect from a loving man?

Some women are willing to do anything to keep the man they want. They forgave him, although they knew perfectly well that he did not deserve it. Tolerated indifference, irritability and lack of respect. If a your relationship is important to both of you, then you should not hide your dissatisfaction with your partner. Because the unspoken words still remain, moreover, sometimes they place a heavy burden on the heart. You cannot fundamentally change his character, but some men need a sharp pull from time to time to keep their nose from turning up.

If a he wants you to be near him, then he himself must take care of how to make your life joyful and pleasant. It makes no sense to continue the relationship, if you are unhappy. Don't sacrifice yourself. This will not earn you love. The more you donate, the less of your personality remains with you. Under no circumstances should you lose self-respect for yourself, but on the contrary, increase your self-esteem.

Men love perfection in a woman. Therefore, do not hide your merits and achievements, because otherwise you will not earn respect for your professionalism from a man.

Most men don't like it when women get nervous or upset. They feel responsible for your pain or guilt for not being able to get rid of it.

Women love to talk about love, about relationships. At first glance, men are less interested in this. And the thing is that it is simply more difficult for them to switch from thoughts to feelings than women. Men assert themselves primarily through career achievements, and women through relationships. In order to talk with your partner about love, try to make him relax and forget about his work, writes from-ua.com.

The perfect girl can only be perfect if if she has the male with which all her talents can be revealed. Whatever he wants from you, you have the right to expect love from him in the full sense of the word.

People cannot live without a sense of belonging to the life of another person. We all need to feel loved and needed. Everyone wants to be taken care of, to show sincere attention. Attachment is one form of manifestation of love. Everyone knows that a sense of well-being is born from an unconscious need to be needed by someone.

This article discusses the origins of attachment. Perhaps this material will help someone understand difficult relationships with a spouse, child, parents and make the right decision.

Concept definition

Attachment is the need for the love of another person. How often we begin not only to expect such manifestations of feelings in our direction, but even get offended, angry when attention is not focused on our person. These are the fears of an insecure person who does not know his worth. Attachment to a person, in fact, reflects our own attitude towards ourselves and life in general. It has been observed that the more a person loves himself, the less he feels the need for other people. That is, strong attachment is always a synonym for personal trouble, lack of confidence in one's strengths and capabilities.

How is this feeling formed?

The origins of any manifestations of trouble should always be sought in childhood. If an adult suffers excessively without the presence of a spouse or child in his life, is afraid to separate from his parents, this means that there is some problem. Perhaps when he was a child, his parents did not pay enough attention to him. And now he is trying to compensate for this dislike, trying to be needed by everyone who can: the second half, his own child. But such an omission cannot be corrected over time: everything must be done on time, and love too. It is very important to go through all the stages of love gradually, so as not to mix relationships later, not to add unnecessary insults and misunderstandings there.

Painful focus on someone interferes with development, the formation of prospects for the future, and hinders personal growth. Attachment to a person sometimes infringes on one's own interests, makes one look for ways to maintain relationships. You don’t need to get too attached, you need to have some personal space: to live on your own and let the other build your own destiny.

Bowlby's Attachment Theory

A British scientist has identified 4 types of predisposition to the development of the inability to live without another person. John Bowlby mainly considered the relationship of a mother with a child, but this model also makes sense in the light of the interaction of adults with each other. The first kind of attachment he called secure. Its essence is as follows: in the relationship, reasonable boundaries have been reached between the adult and the needs of the child. The parent does not in any way infringe on the personality of his child, allows him to fully grow, to receive the necessary knowledge. It must be said that this one is the most constructive of all, since it does not hinder development, does not make one suffer.

Anxious-avoidant line of behavior demonstrates the child's dependence on the parent, forms deep feelings in case of separation from him, the impossibility of even being alone for a short time. Emotional attachment is very strong. Due to the fact that the parent shows little emotion, the child is afraid to express his own feelings aloud, there is a fear of intimacy. As they grow older, such children experience significant difficulties in building personal and because they constantly feel that they are not interesting to others, which leads to doubts about their worth.

The dual-resistance position is manifested by a great fear of the unknown. A person himself puts obstacles in the way of self-knowledge and self-improvement. Uncertainty and shyness are the result of upbringing in childhood, when parents did not recognize the obvious merits of the child, did not praise him for his courage, so he became extremely shy.

A disorganization-controlled position includes all of the above manifestations and is characterized by inconsistency in actions, common mistakes, non-recognition of one's value, fear, Bowlby's Attachment Theory demonstrates the origin of such a phenomenon as a painful psychological dependence on another person. Such relationships always destroy feelings.

Attachment or love?

When does love become an addiction? Where is the line that separates true relationships from those that make a person act as a beggar? Understanding this issue is not as easy as it might seem at first glance.

The most difficult of all are Attachments, whatever they are, sometimes bring great suffering.

A lover constantly needs a partner to assure him of his boundless love, to demonstrate endless tenderness and fidelity. If this does not happen, doubts, suspicions, unfounded accusations, jealousy begin. This happens only because a person is extremely unsure of himself and somewhere in the depths of his soul doubts that he can be loved at all. True feeling is free from demands, arrogant talk and fear. Love wants to give itself, manifest itself in endless care for a loved one and does not require anything in return.

How to recognize an unhealthy relationship?

Painful attachment is always a limited self-perception. It seems to people that they are not loved, but in fact they themselves do not show interest in themselves, do not use opportunities that could benefit them, bring them to a new level of development. A person experiencing a state of acute attachment does not value himself as a person. That is why he needs another to compensate for his own drama in this love.

It turns out a vicious circle. Often the phrase is used: "I can't live without you." In this case, you always want to ask: “How did you live before meeting your loved one? Did they really vegetate, endured hunger and cold? Even if you owe something to a specific person, you need to learn how to live independently so as not to feel led all your life.

Negative consequences

We have already figured out how excessive attachment can interfere with personal growth. Negative phenomena like self-doubt and low self-esteem are inevitable consequences. And what is the result? The personality is lost in the stream of its own fears, and at some point it simply becomes impossible for it to move forward. And it all starts with self-love. If a person is able to think about his well-being, engage in self-education, then his life changes for the better.

How to overcome unrequited love?

Such a fate, most often, befalls precisely those who have not learned to value their own personality. As if these people are given a test, as a result of which they must regain their lost individuality, learn to understand what is important to them.

Many unfortunate lovers are interested in how to get rid of attachment, which brings only suffering? Tips will not help here, you must definitely go through a comprehensive pain that literally tears your heart in half. When the tears dry, people come to the realization that they didn’t really love, but they thought so, because life without this drama had nothing to fill. All you have to do is find a new meaning for your existence.

Why is it so important to love yourself?

Adequate perception of one's own personality is the key to success in any endeavor. Self-love provides many benefits and, above all, a powerful inner core. Then, no matter what happens, a person will know that any problems are solved, there is no global catastrophe that cannot be corrected. A person becomes truly free only when he is able to take responsibility for everything that happens to him.

Thus, painful attachment to other people is not at all an indicator of strong love for them, but a consequence of a serious flaw, an omission in the formation of one's own personality. To live happily, you need to be independent, to gain inner freedom. And only then does it become possible to truly love.

get attached

get attached

vb., nsv., use comp. often

Morphology: I getting attached, you get attached, he she it binds, we we become attached, you get attached, they become attached, get attached, get attached, attached, attached, attached, attached, attached, attached, becoming attached; St. get attached

1. If you become attached to some object, which means that you attach yourself to it closely with a rope (rope, etc.), usually with a knot.

Jung began to tie himself to the mast with a piece of rope. |

“We had to tie ourselves to a snag and go with the flow,” the Cossack advised.

2. If you become attached, which means you attach, connect yourself to someone (something) at a distance with a rope (line, etc.), usually with a knot.

It was necessary to tie to the pile so that you could take at least a step to the side. |

The speleologist managed to tie himself in the dark with a nylon cord to a rock ledge.

3. If you become attached to any person or living being, it means that you feel sympathy for him, good feelings; the need to be together.

Gradually, Stepan began to become attached to this gloomy, silent girl. |

Petrovich was even surprised that he could become so attached to this unsightly dog.

4. If you become attached to any place (house, object, etc.), it means that you feel love for him, unwillingness to part with him, associated with some traits of your character, spiritual needs, memories, etc.

He began to become attached to these places, so similar to his former homeland.

5. Saying that one person (animal, etc.) attached to someone, you mean that this person relentlessly follows another person (animal, etc.).

This mongrel began to become attached to Fedor even at the entrance of the house. |

Irishka managed to become attached to the boys when they went fishing.

6. If you say one person attached to another person, which means that he bothers, sticks to someone, obsessively addresses him.

The old general became attached to everyone with military stories. |

Lipkin still managed to become attached to the girl, introducing her to local species.

7. Saying that the data of any measurements (calculations, etc.) become attached to something, you indicate that they must be brought into line, correlated with the scale or reference point of a device, instrument, or other data intended for this purpose.

“The work of the telescope should be tied to the weather chart,” the head of the observatory pointed out.

Explanatory dictionary of the Russian language Dmitriev. D.V. Dmitriev. 2003 .

See what "attach" is in other dictionaries:

See nitpick... Dictionary of Russian synonyms and expressions similar in meaning. under. ed. N. Abramova, Moscow: Russian Dictionaries, 1999 Synonym dictionary

ATTACH, I tie, I tie, I don't belong. 1. incompatibility to get attached. 2. suffering. to bind. Explanatory Dictionary of Ushakov. D.N. Ushakov. 1935 1940 ... Explanatory Dictionary of Ushakov

TIE, I eat, I eat; yazan; owls. Explanatory dictionary of Ozhegov. S.I. Ozhegov, N.Yu. Shvedova. 1949 1992 ... Explanatory dictionary of Ozhegov

Nesov. 1. Attach to something with a rope, belt, etc. 2. trans. To feel affection for someone or something; to be devoted to someone or something. ott. To be strongly fond of something (any business, occupation). 3. trans. unfold… … Modern explanatory dictionary of the Russian language Efremova

Attached, attached, attached, attached, attached, attached, attached, attached, attached, attached, attached, attached, attached, attached, attached, attached, attached, ... ... Forms of words

Get behind... Antonym Dictionary

become attached- get attached, ayus, ayus ... Russian spelling dictionary

become attached- (I), tie / call (s), vaesh (sya), vayut (sya) ... Spelling Dictionary of the Russian Language

See Bind and Bind... encyclopedic Dictionary

become attached- see become attached; aye, aye; nsv ... Dictionary of many expressions

There are no tricks in the arsenal of a man in love. Often they are whole multi-way strategies that allow you to envelop the passion in your networks. For example, some people resort to ignoring, considering it the best way bind the person you like.

Such a strategy can really bring the desired result, but it must be used correctly. Do not forget that the effect of such actions must be “fixed”, otherwise the passion will cool off towards its conqueror in the shortest possible time.

How does ignore work?

Why is this method considered effective? This is largely due to one interesting quality of a person - he is able to take an interest in someone who ignores him.

Nevertheless, psychologists say that such an approach can help draw a person’s attention only for a while, but having achieved his goal, this ignored interest will lose. In addition, according to experts, you can count on this method only if the passion initially has at least minimal sympathy for the one who is trying to win it.

You can show indifference in several cases:

• Immediately, as soon as they begin to show attention to you;
• You can start ignoring a person in order to bind him to yourself after flirting or even at the initial stage of a romantic relationship. This is a more advantageous option, since you will let your passion know that you like her, while in the first case you can simply scare her away with your indifference. In addition, before you bind a person to yourself, you can understand how he treats you, whether there is an interest on his part.

What do psychologists say about attachment?

Experts speak of it as a state in which a person is attracted to someone or something. At the same time, in the definition of attachment there is a mention that this attraction, as a rule, is not due to profit, love, or some other interest.

However, this does not mean that a person put on ignore is guaranteed not to begin to feel sympathy or even love for his conqueror.

In psychology, there are several types of attachment between people. If we talk about the relationship between a man and a woman, it is worth remembering that sometimes partners develop a pathological attachment. If there is a feeling of unhealthy, painful attachment, a person is deprived of freedom, becomes dependent on a partner, due to which, as a rule, both do not feel comfort in such a pair. Love in such a union is also usually not discussed.

But relations can develop in a different scenario. A feeling of attachment can arise not only on the basis of sympathy for each other, you can also bind a loved one to yourself on the basis of such an aspect as common interests.

How to use ignore?

How to act in order to achieve the desired result?

Consider a few tips from psychologists:

Do not forget that you need to act subtly and very carefully for this method to work, otherwise the representative of the opposite sex you like will guess your strategy and lose interest.

In addition, you can not use this method in relation to the person who used the ignore to get your attention.

If you decide to use indifference to draw attention to yourself, you should also think about what to do next, because psychology says that often in this way you can attract attention to yourself only for a short time.

What to do next?

Sooner or later you will meet your passion, because neither you nor your partner need you to keep him intrigued for years.

First of all, remember that the date you finally agree to should be initiated by a member of the opposite sex.

Consider the advice on how to bind a person to yourself that psychology gives.

These are the first steps that you have to take in the first stages of building a relationship. If you decide that your feelings are strong, and you have a wonderful future together, you will have to make more efforts. At this stage, ignoring is not the best remedy, because you will need to act completely differently.

Become reliable and supportive in everything else for your soulmate, do not seek to change him - apart from a negative reaction from him, you will not achieve anything else with this.

Accept a person as he is, and do not try to make him the one you would like to see in front of you. Become an inspiration for your partner, but you don’t need to control him - he needs to feel that you trust him.

So, you can bind a person to yourself with the help of ignore, but just think for a start whether you exactly planned your actions, because he should not guess anything.